The Mask

Mimi got Wm a giant swim mask to try and lure him into putting his face in the water.  While it was ultimately unsuccessful today at the pool, Wm sure looked cute!

I think Wm's favorite part of going to the pool is the GIANT snack he insists on taking down after the trauma of being in the actual water is over.  Today he had 3 entire graham cracker sheets, a packet of peanut butter crackers, a fruit rubber, and a juice box (this was not too long after lunch, keep in mind).  I can still count all his ribs.  I bet he burns 5,000 calories a day - he is always on the go.

And, because Wm's bowels are hilarious...

Wm: [from the bathroom] DADDY!  I clogged the potty! [strained gurgling sound] Oh, never mind.  It went down.  But it was a GIANT poop!  There were A LOT of floaters.

Steve: Awesome, bud.  Thanks for that.

Cray-Cray

In the past hour, Wm has said the funniest stuff ever.

While Steve and I were arguing over when Zoombezi Bay closes, Wm says, "I have no idea what's happening right now, but I'm pretty freakin' sure Daddy is wrong." [pause] "Because daddy is cray-cray."

Then, we get home and Steve announces he has to pee and Wm yells, "Don't tell us your business, Daddy!"

The Good Kid

Wm earns $1 a week in allowance and is expected to, for that, fold his own laundry, clean his room, and clean up after himself (at dinner, around the house, etc).  He really wanted some $5 iPad app so we told him he could earn extra allowance by doing more chores.  Wm could earn $1 for sweeping downstairs and $1 for sweeping upstairs.  He gladly took us up on that.  And it was hilarious to watch him vacuum since the sweeper was bigger than he was!  But he gave it 100% effort!

We are so proud of Wm!  He has continually told us that another kid at camp, who used to be his BFF in kindergarten, is super mean to him.  Then, yesterday, he said this kid hit him in the face with a ball and punched him in the stomach.  So, clearly, we were appalled.  We talked with Wm about good ways to respond to stuff like that and then asked if he wanted us to address it with his teachers.  He said he did, so this morning at drop off, Steve decided he would say something.  Turns out, the teacher had 2 incident reports for us to sign for the beatings Wm took yesterday.  She said this other kid has been to the office 3 times in the last week because of how he's treated Wm!  I guess she said Wm is a "loner" and after a few activities, needs some quiet alone play. And this kid keeps harassing him and following him around - and Wm just keeps trying to walk away and escape, so then the kid gets pissed and goes nuts.  She said it was 100% the other kid and Wm is awesome about it!!  First time ever Wm has been the good kid on the receiving end of bad kid antics!! So, she said they are having a  meeting with the other parents and will keep a REAL close eye on the other kid and keep him away from Wm.  I am just so happy that Wm is the good kid this time!  I know someone who is getting Jeni's this weekend.

Bad Guys

Steve: My favorite guy on GI Joe is Snake Eyes.
Wm: Mine is Cobra Commander.
Steve: You always like the bad guy!!!
Wm: I think the bad guys are usually just more detailed.

Random Stuff

While trying to kick Steve, Wm hit his ear on the table and hurt himself.  He got super pissed when I told him his fairy godmother flew away because he was being evil so he got hurt.  So then Steve put his post-hernia surgery ice pack holder on Wm's head and all was well.  And hilarious.

The boys were playing Plants vs. Zombies on the iPad and weirdly talking in (what appears to be) bad Italian accents.  It went on FOREVER.  Or just seemed to.  Here is a snippet:

And then here are a couple more Color Run pictures (in addition to the ones I already posted today!)

We were RUNNING!

We will also now all have a bad case of Orange Lung

Color Run was super fun!!!  Unfortunately, Steve gave Wm a chocolate chip bagel from Panera Bread for breakfast this morning after I was gone.  Only to discover, after it had been devoured, that it has milk in it.  So Wm and Steve were in the bathroom when we crossed the finish line.  Once we managed to find them, they were both very crabby.  Steve was like, "The meter expired FOREVER ago.  That took A LOT longer than I thought!  We need to GO." And Wm was going, "My belly SERIOUSLY hurts!  Like...major pain.  LOTS OF PAIN HERE."  So we did not get to enjoy any jazz or any ribs. I EARNED those ribs, too.

Color Run

BEFORE

All of us after

AFTER

Colorful!

WHAT! OKAY!

Wm just finished his bag of cotton candy from the pool today.  It took him 5 days to take down a small bag of cotton candy.  I'm not sure he's my kid.  If I got a bag of cotton candy, it was down my gullet in under 15 minutes - regardless of size. Willie's blue tongue cracked me up.  And...is probably pretty good evidence that said cotton candy is no health food.

I'm guessing that 98% of people who read this blog have no idea who Lil Jon is.  But, I find it HILARIOUS that Wm has started to do a Lil Jon imitation!  We were playing in his room and all of a sudden he goes, "WHAT....OOOOKAYYYYY!"  Loooooved it.  Dave Chappelle does an awesome Lil Jon imitation too, so for those of you not familiar with Lil Jon (or the comedic stylings of Dave Chappelle), enjoy...

Wm's was almost as good.  That kid is HILARIOUS.

Last, but not least, Steve and Wm will be coming to cheer me on at the Color Run this weekend!  It ends at the Jazz and Rib Fest, so I may be colorfully eating my weight in ribs immediately following.  WHAT!  OOOOOKAAAAAAY!

Little Fish

Wm went swimming today and he had the best day yet!  He went all the way out and explored until the water reached his chin while he stood on his tippy toes.  And he rode on Daddy's back and we played a strange version of swimming tag.  In fact, we went to the pool both yesterday and today!  Mimi is making strides with getting Wm more comfortable in the water.  Our pool is awesome - and FREE.  We pay $1 for a "leisure card" and then the pool is totally free forever after.  It's remarkably nice for being totally free...and hasn't been crowded either time we went.  We will be back often!  Wm has managed to con Mimi into getting him popcorn both days and me into cotton candy today.  He is a master con artist - it's the baby blues...they can't be denied.  (Wm even has a name for it; he says, he's giving you "his cute eyes" and makes them all big and bats his eyelashes.  He knows exactly what he's about.)

After we left the pool, we went over to the playground next door.  Wm said he had to pee, but there aren't any potties.  So I go, "well, bud, you can either hold it until we get home or sneak into those trees over there."  Into the trees Wm went.  Then, he hasn't figured out how to just take out the necessary bits, so I look over and see his whole tiny butt flappin' in the wind.  He sees me looking at him, chagrined, and calls out nervously, "I hope Santa isn't seeing this!"

I don't take my phone to the pool so I don't have to worry about it being stolen, but here are some pre-swim shots I got of Wm in his swim attire:

Wm's hard core swim shirt

Super excited to go swimming!

After Daddy told him has to put sunscreen on his face.

I tell ya - those swim shirts are the best investment I ever made.  I don't have to worry about slathering sunscreen all over myself - and Wm!  And no worries about reapplication after reapplication.  I just put some on our faces before we leave the house, then again after a lengthy swim session - pop on my sun hat, and I'm protected!  We spent hours at the pool both days and Wm and I are still pale and happy.

Old and Crusty

Wm, playing Plants vs. Zombies, says, "I am at my wit end!"

After jumping on Steve and me saying, "careful with Daddy!" Wm says, "yeah...he takes a long time to heal because he is old and crusty."

Wm, The Lost

Wm's summer camp managed to lose him.  He went to the bathroom, and while he was gone, the teacher "forgot" he was in the bathroom and took the kids down to the rumpus room.  So Wm returns to his clubhouse to find it empty.  He then began to wander the halls, weeping. Until it occurred to him to go to the office.  They managed to call around and get him re-hooked up with his group.  He was majorly freaked out.  It was a good opportunity for me to talk to him about what to do when you're lost.  But, that is the first time Wm has been lost.  He's not much of a wanderer, and we keep a pretty close eye on him.  So it was majorly terrifying for him.  Luckily, it was Steve who took him the next day and got the apology speech.  Because, surprisingly, Steve is way more of a hardass than I am.  If someone apologizes to me, for nearly anything, I am usually like, "Oh, it's OK...no problem."  So I probably would have been like, "It's fine...lose him, don't lose him...it's OK." But, Steve stood his ground and just mostly silently glared at the teacher, refusing to tell her it was OK.  Good for Steve - because, really, it's NOT OK to lose my kid!  And, I know from experience, The Steve Glare of Doom can be scary. I have been on the receiving end many a time.

Wm also got to go to some splash park which he declared "lame." He was all, "I want to go to ZOOMBEZI BAY!" So, I guess we are Zoombezi Bay bound at some point - even though Shortypants is too short to ride 80% of the rides.

Half the park. The swim shirt will be useful.

We are going to the outdoor pool near our house for the first time this weekend.  And Wm is geared up to learn the doggy paddle!

Good Talk

Me: Your fingernails need to be cut.  Why don't you do it?
Wm: No.
Me: Why not?
Wm: I tried once and hurt myself.
Me: How about you try again?
Wm: No.
Me: How about we agree that you'll try again when you're 7?
Wm: No. When I'm 20.

And, Steve is evil...
Me: I'm going to buzz my hair.
Steve: No.
Me: Yes.
Steve: I won't do it.
Me: That's the awesome part...I don't need you.
Steve: No.
Me: YES.
Steve: I will leave you. [pause] Good talk. [slaps my butt HARD].  Love you. [walks out of room.]
Me: [plotting]

WE HAVE THE POWER!!!!!!

Power has been restored to Pinkliwink Acres and all is right with our world once more!  Wm seemed remarkably unfazed by the entire thing.  He, mostly, didn't even notice until the iPad ran out of juice and it was too dark to read or put together Legos.  Meanwhile, for the first few days, Steve acted like he was a step away from death by heat stroke at all times.  There was lots of dramatic sighing and laying around in nothing but underpants, moaning.  (He is currently in the shower singing a happy song - how the times have changed.) Then, after our power came on and was cruelly yanked away again...I lost it.  I nearly cried.  It was the hope....the dashed hope.  So we spent yesterday compiling survival gear.  We got some oil lamps and drove all the way out to Pickerington to get battery operated fans.  Even though we only needed them for less than 24 hours, it was TOTALLY worth it.  

Wm has said about ONE MILLION hilarious things the past few days - real winners.  But, without internet, I haven't been able to write them down. And, of course, have forgotten.  I do remember the best, though:

Steve is giving Wm a bath...

Steve: This ball stinks! (some bath toy)

Wm: My balls stink? Let's wash 'em!

Still Powerless

We are still without power.  But, at least we are at work today - comfortable in the AC and charging all our electronics!  Wm's summer camp is closed, so he's at work with me today.  He has completely ignored me to play with the iPad all day.  He misses it the way one would miss a limb.  Wm's summer camp did not notify us in any way that they were closed, so that was awesome.  But, the second storm we got last night nicely cooled it off for sleeping last night!!  It was the first good night's sleep I've gotten since the power went out.  I don't sleep well when it's so hot!  And, ToothGrinder McGee sleeping next to me ("it's dark and scary, Mommy!") is not conducive to sleep.

One cool thing about the power being out is that the neighborhood gathers every night to chat and hang out. Our next door neighbors have a fire every night and have invited the whole neighborhood to join.  The first night of the storm, we all walked down to investigate the downed tree and power line damage. I snapped a picture of Wm walking back with his neighborhood amigos because they were all holding hands and it was so cute...

Powerless

Very dark and very hot.