Stress

At breakfast this morning...
Wm: I'm done.
Me: You didn't eat anything!
Wm: My tummy hurts.
Me: You're probably just hungry. Why don't you try to eat a little something and see if that helps?
Wm: [sigh] No - I think it's stress.

Steve went upstairs the other night to put on his PJ's and make sure Wm was asleep (he sneaks books into his bed and reads secretly until all hours) and about 2 minutes later, he texted me this:

cutely sleeping

Kung Fu Wm

Today was Wm's first kung fu class. He was REAL pissed about going and insisted he would not have any fun. Then...FUN. He had a blast and can't wait to go next week. I tried to tell him that he never wants to do anything - and always says it won't be fun. Then, when forced to do it, he has super fun and is so happy he did it. Soooo...there's a fairly obvious lesson there. But he just smirked at me evilly.

KUNG FU MASTER

Kickin' a little ass

We have drilled into Wm's head that he is NEVER EVER EVER allowed to tell anyone online ANYTHING other than his first name. And if anyone asks his last name, or even what city he lives in, he is not, under any circumstances, to give out that information. Or any information. Apparently this has worked very well. Wm's favorite activity is to get on his friend from school's server and play Minecraft with him while, at the same time, skyping. So they play Minecraft and chitty chat about important 8 year old matters. He came downstairs this afternoon and goes, "Mommy - Henry wants to know where I live so we can have a playdate. Can I tell him?" I was like, "Of course." And Wm said, "Are you sure it's OK to give out my address?" I reminded him that all his friends know that he lives up the street from the school and Henry is very aware of where he lives - and I do not think Henry plans to kidnap or murder him. Wm goes, "Oh...yeah." 

Wm's Skype habit has also provided me with a new hobby: humiliating Wm. I ran into his room and bust into "uhhhhh weem-away...uhhhhhh weem-away....in the village, the peaceful village, the lion sleeeeeps tooooonight!" Wm furiously whispered, "MOMMY! GO AWAY!" Then, later, he was all, "Don't do that! Henry heard you!!! He asked if that was my mom singing in the background and I had to tell him yes!" Mission accomplished. 

Randomness

Wm's spring break is creeping up on us! I am taking a couple days off with him, so I am looking forward to spring break too!! After school yesterday a mysterious package arrived with Wm's name on it. Of course, he was all over it. He opened it to discover a giant tin shaped like an easter egg filled with Cheryl's cookies in the shapes of baby chicks, bunnies, carrots, and easter eggs. Wm goes, "OH. MY. GOD. There are a MILLION cookies!!!! Where did these even come from????" Upon discovering they were from Mimi and Guy, Wm goes, "Mimi. Of course. She knows I love cookies. And it's early - like Mimi." Ha! I think keeping Steve out of them will be Wm's greatest challenge.

baby chick cookie!

Sorting through all the goodness

When Steve came down this morning, I noticed both he and Wm had blue striped hoodies and khaki pants on. I yelled, "TWINS! Let me get a picture!" And this is how Steve's face rolled:

Steve's face: I will murder your puppies

So then I told Steve he should, at least, try to look like he wasn't a serial killer and he gave me this:

Thinks he is hilarious

When Wm came home yesterday, he told me about this weird concoction they made from candy peeps at Clubhouse.  One of the steps involved microwaving the peeps. And, as everyone knows, when you microwave marshmallow stuff, it gets hugely puffy. So Wm was talking about the "fat peeps" all excitedly and then goes, "OK - after the pat feeps…wait." PAT FEEPS! We laughed so hard Wm gave himself the hiccups. No one else seems to think this is as funny as we do. But…PAT FEEPS! C'MON!!!!! That's awesome.

State Fair

Wm had his big State Fair extravaganza at school today! Without further ado...

Heading out!

Suave.

Showing off to visitors

Genius.

Wm, of course, had the best display. Here he is explaining what is on it:

He is also a tiny Walt Whitman. Here is the poem he wrote about Colorado:

I am Colorado.

I wonder when the Meadow Larks will sing again.

I hear the winter wind blow and whistle across my surface.

I see the columbines grow again in my dreams.

I am Colorado.

I pretend that it's summer, and that the columbines are growing, and the Meadow Larks are singing.

I feel the snow softly land on me.

I touch Kansas, and ask him when he thinks summer will come back, if ever.

I worry that winter will never end on the mountains, and in my river.

I cry at the thought...but wait, is that the columbines starting to bloom, and the call of the Meadow Lark?

I am Colorado.

I understand now how it goes, winter is long, and summer is short.

I say that I am glad to hear the Meadow Larks again!

I dream that Denver will grow, and my population too.

I try hard not to sing along with the birds, and whistle to the rhythm of my river way down below.

I hope that it is a long time until winter comes again.

I am Colorado.

Kitchen Complete!

I finished painting the kitchen cabinets on Thursday and Steve hung the last doors today. So we are DONE! And now, the kitchen finally feels COMPLETE! Steve and I are both really happy with the way it turned out!! It is especially awesome because I took a walk this morning and the guy that bought me and Steve's first house was outside working on it. I stopped and said hello and introduced myself. He took me on a tour so I could see what he has done - and what he plans to do. And, MAN, I had forgotten how tiny that house is and how much work it needed!!! He has redone the bathroom and it looks amazing, but the kitchen looks exactly like it did (only much grimier thanks to the buttface who bought it from us!) when we lived there. Coming home, our kitchen felt so spacious and gorgeous!! YAY complete kitchen!!!!

Now, a tour of the progress of The Kitchen:

What it looked like when we moved in.

New floor and paint!

Jazzy cabinets and tiled backsplash

And now, drum roll, please - the final final. I am SO DONE messing around in the kitchen!

Reader

Today is the Read-a-Thon assembly at school and Wm *may* be a little bit excited:

As you can (maybe!) see from the picture, Wm read enough to get a free Read-a-Thon tshirt (which kids are supposed to wear to the assembly) - as well as a free pizza, free trip to Magic Mountain, and a free (and pretty nice!) Minecraft book. He is currently SUPER into the "Warrior" book series. It's something to do with feral cats. This is making me sad because I am not reading them and he is refusing to read the books I have for us to read (Hiroshima and The Fourteenth Goldfish) so he can continue with the Warrior books. I am all about whatever fosters a love of reading, but I am hoping he's getting near the end of these books soon so we can reinstitute The Book Club.

Nerfday

Wm has decided he wants a nerf gun themed birthday party. All his friends will bring their nerf guns and they will have a "turf war" in the backyard (I guess that's something from Minecraft). So, naturally, I had some ideas….

Me: Omg, Wm, would could get a nerf gun cake and write on it "Happy Nerfday, William!"
Wm: YES!
Me: And we could sing "Happy Nerfday to you, Happy Nerfday to you, happy Nerfday, dear William…happy Nerfday to you!"
Wm: That's a little over the top.
Me: What? Why?
Wm: I was with you on the nerf cake and I think it would be funny to write "Happy Nerfday!" on the cake. But singing "Happy Nerfday!" seems a little excessive.

So, apparently, I got overly excited and need to rein it in.

SO. TRUE.

Summer Shopping!

Mimi took Wm for his bi-annual new season clothes shopping extravaganza! This outing was a whole new experience:
Years 0-5: Mimi and I went sans Wm and had a grand time picking out cute things
Year 5-7: Wm came along to try things on, but was an otherwise passive observer while Mimi and I had a grand time picking out cute things.
Year 8-??: Wm came along to try things on and had INTENSE and DEFINITE ideas about what he would and would not wear.
We also always find cute things to send to Griffin and Evvie too - Wm LOVES shopping for Evvie's clothes. ;-)

Note: that was NOT purchased for Evvie - don't panic

Last night while I was tucking Wm into bed, he asked me what a "sin" was...

Me: Some people's religions believe that god wants them do to certain things and NOT do  other things. The things you are not supposed to do are sins.

Wm: What kinds of things are sins?

Me: There's actually a whole list of 10 for Christian people. I have no idea what all 10 are. But, some are total common sense and some are weird.

Wm: What are they?

Me: Well, there are the obvious ones like don't kill and don't steal. Then there are strange ones like "don't take the lord's name in vain." That means, like, say "oh my god" or "goddamnit."

Wm: Welp, I'm going to hell.

Me: Yeah - AND there's one about honoring your mother and father!

Wm: [sigh]

Me: And there's one about coveting, and I feel like it's more specific, but I can't remember. We can look it up tomorrow if you really want to know.

Wm: What's coveting?

Me: To covet is to want something that belongs to someone else. Like - to be jealous.

Wm: I covet stuff all the time!!!

Me: What could you possibly covet?

Wm: Other people's desserts at lunch.

Top Ten

Wm decided to stay in the same school next year and opt to do the new pull-out gifted program there. He is so happy he gets to stay where he's at and still take advantage of great gifted services!! We were even more pleased with his decision when they posted the results of the statewide school performance index and Wm's school is in the top 10 schools in the state of Ohio. And I'm not talking elementary schools. I mean ALL schools (elementary, middle, and high - private and public). In fact, Wm's school is in the top 3 elementary schools in the entire STATE. So we feel very confident he is getting an OUTSTANDING education there!! (However, the middle school it funnels into was number 2,194 - soooo…that's not so good. But, hopefully, he can attend the gifted middle school or the Metro school at Ohio State and bypass that action so we don't have to move!)

This time change is kicking my butt. I hate daylight savings time. A lot. I was too tired yesterday morning to pack a lunch like I do every day. So when lunchtime rolled around, and I looked outside to see it was pouring rain and super gross out, I did not feel like running out to grab something. I texted Steve and jokingly told him he should bring me lunch (since it would take him a half hour just to get here!) This was his response:

HAHA!

Needless to say, he did not bring me food. I coerced a friend into going out with me, so it wasn't too bad. And I mustered the will to pack this morning (but not shower). So today I have food and greasy hair. I also forgot to force Wm to bathe yesterday evening, so he, too, is greasy. This week is a fog. I thought Wm was suffering the effects of the time change as well because he had a weird meltdown doing his Math homework last night (which never happens!) But then Steve came and looked at it and he had a meltdown! Neither of them could figure it out. When you send Math home with your 3rd grade class that a man who has taken 4 college-level calculus classes and has tutored college math cannot figure out…something is wrong. If I can't figure out, that's to be expected.

Lucky

Yesterday was a busy day…and a VERY good reminder about how privileged we are. When I got to the YWCA, there were no tweens at all. The oldest kid I talked with wasn't even 10 yet. But it was even worse than I could have imagined - I WISHED for sullen tweens. I chatted with a girl exactly Wm's age while we attempted (and failed miserably) to make a lanyard and she told me she was in the 3rd grade, but hadn't been to school in a while because "life was complicated" and her mom had no longer been able to afford the motel they were living in - so they ended up in the shelter. There were, of course, lots of other kids around (and I was able to read out loud to some super cute itty bitties and do sing alongs with some in-betweeners), but it was the girl in the same grade as Wm, with the same blond hair and blue eyes, that really stuck with me. As we left, one of the women I went with said, "Well…back to our bubble - who wants to go out to dinner?" And I left feeling like we really do live in a bubble. I hope I never forget that - or how lucky we are!

In Wm's world, he spent yesterday skyping with a friend and playing Minecraft on his server, making YouTube videos of their exploits, going to church (and learning about the differences and similarities in different religion's stories and drawing Noah's "arc" instead of "ark" - wondering why everyone else was drawing boats while was was drawing a decorated curved line), and worked hard on his state fair project. He and I made his first "artifact":

A miner and his "gold" nugget

Steve and Wm also set out to work on his map. He got a GIANT poster board, so it should be something to behold!! 

Finally, Steve has started to wear my FitBit to sleep on Saturday nights so it will vibrate him silently awake so he won't set the alarm and jar me awake at 6:15am. There was one slight mishap because I didn't sync it after the time change so it went off an hour late and he was all upset. BUT, I discovered that Steve is barely alive when he sleeps. I'm not even 100% sure he breathes. Here is his sleep tracking:

And here is a "typical" night for me:

No wonder Steve needs less sleep - he doesn't so much as twitch the entire time he's out!!

Optimistic

Wm came home from school on Friday with a button (the green one seen below!) that said "OPTIMISTIC" on it. He was practically bursting waiting for me to notice it and when I asked him about it, he goes, "They announced it at lunch!!! I AM THIS MONTH'S CHARACTER CLUB WINNER!!! The character trait of the month is 'optimistic.' When they said my name, I could not believe it!!!!"

Captain Optimistic

I asked him if he felt like he was pretty optimistic and he goes, "Mommy, you know, I have found...when you you think positive thoughts, positive things happen." HA!!!! He also said that because he is very fast doing his school work, he is almost always the first one done - then he walks around and helps/encourages his classmates. So he thinks those are the reasons for his Big Win. He was super cute about it!! It also made me laugh because he recreated the moment when they called his name for me - and he pronounces our last name differently than we do, so it's always jarring (in a funny way) to hear other people use the Wm-invented version.

We went to see Joseph and the Amazing Technicolor Dream coat this afternoon and it was actually pretty fun. Wm, especially, really enjoyed it. And, afterwards, we went back to our friends' house with them and Steve hung out at their bar drinking and laughing his butt off, so he had a grand time too.

The Boys dreamingcoating it up

TGIM

We have a super crazy weekend coming up that is making me really look forward to Monday! Tomorrow, I have been talked into going to see a friend's daughter perform in her school's production of Joseph and the Amazing Technicolor Dreamcoat. I hate the following things: musicals, live theater, other people's children, crowds, biblical junk, dreamcoats. So I am pretty much the grumpiest human alive about having to go to this thing. Wm, however, is actually weirdly excited. We are going out to lunch with a friend beforehand and Wm LOVES him, so he is all kinds of happy.

THEN, on Sunday, I am volunteering at the YWCA with homeless children. And I found out a couple days ago that my assignment is with the tweens. TWEENS. If there is a specific type of child I specifically don't like…it's tweens. The Evil Sacks of Hormones are always sullen and snotty. I have to spend hours making weird plastic lanyards with them. There is a s'mores station with elementary kids and I wanted that one so hard. I think it was the most coveted spot. Makes sense. Younger children…S'MORES. Amazing. Curse the fates that landed me with the lanyards and tweens instead of children and chocolate!

While I am hanging out with The Tweens, Wm and Steve will be working on a topographical map of Colorado. Wm's grade is doing a "State Fair" (that is kind of like a science fair, but each kid has been assigned a state to learn all about instead of a science project). Wm has Colorado and decided to make a topographical map to showcase the mountains as part of the project. He is also collecting 2-3 "artifacts" about CO and is preparing a paper and presentation all about the state. I am in charge of assistance with the artifacts and paper/presentation and Steve is in charge of helping with the map. I can't wait to see the finished product!!

And, here is the Nefarious Cat of Evilness trying to pretend like he's benevolent and docile now that the cabinets are all put back together and there is nothing else for him to lick (besides any water anyone leaves out on any surface):

You See Steve Rolling

Steve has gotten yet another ticket. This time he "rolled through a stop sign." Which he, of course, vehemently denies and insists the cop was just "an asshole." I told him I am very disappointed he couldn't flirt his way out of the ticket. He's now on the same thin ice the cat is on.

Closest representation of Steve driving

I MAY forgive him because he is currently working on my belated birthday present. It's belated because it's taking him way longer than expected to complete. He's actually painting the kitchen cabinets for me! Wheeee!!!! They look AMAZING so far! The cat shredded all the cool papering he did last summer, so they have been looking raggedy on the bottom where the Evil Feline Menace can reach (he started doing it to the cabinet where we keep his food - the fat lard). Steve read up on how to do it and is doing some sand, prime, sand, prime, coat 1, coat 2 thing that is taking an insane amount of time to complete - but looks super nice and should be very sturdy. I will share pictures when he's done! Because…WOW…painting some 60 year old wood cabinets makes them look like new! But, right now, our kitchen is torn apart and it's all stressful. (And, also, the cat keeps licking things I've set outside of the cabinets Steve is working on and I'm not sure what he's licked, so then I have to wash everything again. He also keeps trying to eat all the fish's food. Basically, he is Evil Incarnate - and, if it exists, Schroeder wants it in his mouth.)

Gifted Good News!

A letter came home from school with Wm yesterday (we had gotten an email, so we knew it was coming) about the Gifted & Talented services available for Wm next year. At first, Wm was bummed because they have spent the last year (after the hot mess they made of things last year at this time!) reconfiguring the entire program - and one of the things they did was to get rid of the ECLIPSE classes. However, I think what they've done is even better! There is now a one-site G&T school where the entire school is for gifted kids. They haven't announced the location yet, which is not cool. But, a bonus is that school is grades 3-8, so it would continue all the way until high school! However, the even better news is that Wm can stay at his home school and now receive pull-out G&T services!!!!! So if they announce the location and it sucks - or just if Wm doesn't want to leave all his friends and wants to stay at his familiar school he can walk to - he can stay where he is and get great services! Every day, they would pull him out of class for 90 minutes of gifted reading instruction and 60 minutes of gifted math instruction. So he would be in a special pull-out gifted class for two and a half hours every single day AT HIS HOME SCHOOL!!!! We are thrilled! Wm is very happy and is saying he doesn't even want to look at the G&T school, but I figure we'll give it a peek when they tell us where it is. Maybe it's close and amazing. But, no matter what, we are hoping Wm is going to have a great year next year!

Steve and I were regaling Wm with tales of the horrors of sleep away camp. Wm said, "I am never doing that." I said, "Oh yes, you are. All kids have to suffer through sleep away camp and be completely miserable - it's a right of passage."  He started asking questions about the accommodations (he was concerned about flushing toilets, actual beds, and sleeping alone). When I explained he would be in a cabin, with a toilet, and likely at least 3 other boys, he sighed and said, "I still prefer more sophisticated housing." HA! Don't we all, Wm…don't we all.

Snow Walk

Wm had a crazy weekend of fun! He had a birthday party at Dave & Buster's on Saturday that lasted for hours (and Steve and I had some awesome kid-free time while he was there!) and then he was only home for a couple minutes when the doorbell rang and Wm went of sledding with another friend. He came home just in time for a late dinner and then crashed. He usually gets up around 6-ish on the weekends, but I got up and walked past his bedroom at 7:45 (where he is usually playing on his computer) and said, "hey, Wm, did you see the cat?" No response. I looked in his room and he was still out like a light! Once he dragged himself out of bed, we saw that it had snowed and snowed and snowed. So we skipped church and decided to take a snow walk to Mimi's house. No one had shoveled yet because it was early and the snow was going to come down all day - so it was slow going! Wm said 3 times, "this is a good leg work out!" After we got back from Mimi's and Daddy got home from work, we had a big lunch (Wm had his favorite: grilled cheese) and then Wm went back back out sledding with his friends. Then said friends came over and played until we had to kick them out to eat dinner. Wm was exhausted! And, also, childhood is very different now. Wm and his friends eventually got on his computer and skyped with another friend then all played some game together on various devices. Crazy times! 

Snow walk!

Wm bundled up!