Easter

Wm didn't let something silly like the non-existance of the Easter Bunny thwart his egg hunt and Easter Basket arrival!  We hid all the eggs before we went to sleep last night and Wm came down this morning and had to find all 12 before he got his basket.  Mission: Accomplished.

The last egg!

All 12!

Prizes!!

I asked Wm if he knew why we celebrated Easter and he goes, "does it have something to do with Christians?" I said, "Kinda.  Christians believe this was the day Jesus rose from the dead after he died on the cross.  He was dead for 3 or so days or something...then came out of a cave, I think maybe forgave some sins and then went up to heaven.  I may have to look up the details online - I'm not super clear, obviously."  Wm goes, "Never mind, that is crazy." So I said, "Well, the reason we celebrate Easter is the more 'traditional' celebration that went on long before Jesus.  We do Easter because it is a celebration of springtime, renewal, and rebirth!  The earth is waking up from the long winter sleep!  That's why we color eggs - eggs symbolize rebirth and fertility."  Wm goes, "Yeah...I'm going with that reason."

Illusions

Wm has no more holiday illusions.  He was very suspicious that there was no Easter Bunny and has continued to tell me he thinks the Easter Bunny isn't real.  This morning, he goes, "tell me the TRUTH - is there an Easter Bunny?" so I said, "No, buddy...he is pretend."  Wm thought on that for a second and then goes, "Hmmmm...tell me THE TRUTH.  REALLY.  THE TRUTH.  Is there a Santa?" I go, "No, he is pretend too."  Wm was quiet for a minute and then goes, "Yeah...I don't really care as long as the presents still show up."  HAHAHA!!  Then he goes, "Wait - do you steal my teeth from under my pillow and leave me money?  Why do you do that?"  All the dots were connected.  We had a long talk with him about not ruining the "magic" for other kids and he needs to be sure to keep these things to himself.  A friend's 9 year old daughter had a friend that told her there was no Santa and she cried for days.  So I told Wm some kids would be crushed to hear that there's no Santa.  Luckily, Wm is a mercenary little bugger and didn't care at all where the presents came from...as long as they kept coming.  He's also too sharp by half - who figures this out on his own at 6 years old?

I talked Wm into going jogging with me today.  He was not sure at all about this plan, but I got him all suited up in his gear and off we went.  We jogged down the ravine and Wm LOVED it!!  We saw ducks, a cardinal, cute bridges Wm ran across, a babbling brook, and and flowers blooming.  In all, we jogged for about 2 miles.  We raced up a really big hill - Wm beat me by a mile!  Then we stopped at the playground and played.  Thank god for a spring-like day!  And Wm says he wants to go jogging with me every day that it's nice!  I told him we should run a 5K together and he is all excited.  Yay!!  Steve hates walking and/or jogging, so I finally have a partner!

Monday morning, Wm will have his first girl cousin!  We are all excited to see Evvie's face and know that she is here and she is healthy and well!!  Mimi came over today to deliver her Easter basket for Wm and she flies out to Denver tomorrow.  Congrats Drew, Jess, and Griffin!!!

Black & White

Me: I think I'm going to dye my hair again this weekend.  But dark brown this time.
Wm: That will be ugly.  I like it shining red like it is now.
Me: Wow.  Well, I want it Daddy's color. Daddy has such pretty hair.
Wm: Oh, Daddy's hair is black.  [studying Steve's hair] Well, I guess it's really black and white now.
Steve: Hey!
Wm: There's A LOT of white here on the side.

Book Report

Wm wrote a book report on The Three Little Pigs and it is pretty much the best thing ever.  My favorite part is the last line.

Click to enlarge 

Last line: "If you like magic, a beautiful setting, and a happy ending, you would enjoy reading the fairy tale The Three LIttle Pigs by Edward Miller."

Tomorrow is Wm's last day of school before spring break.  He is super excited!! I just wish it was spring-like.

Big Foot

Well, there is big news!  Wm, at nearly 7 years old, is finally out of toddler sized shoes!  After an exhaustive search for well-made summer sandals, we finally got him some.  And they were a size 13 - the first official "youth" size instead of a "Toddler Size 12."  Wm was all, "I am finally in adult shoes!" and I had to tell him that he has finally just entered kid shoes - and that he has been in toddler shoes.  He goes, "wait - aren't toddlers like 2 years old?" A sad realization for Captain Tinytoes.

Wm has been so intent on what he is getting for his birthday and all the stuff, Stuff, STUFF he is going to haul in that I wanted to do something to take his focus off of STUFF for himself.  So I asked him if he wanted to donate half of any money he gets for his birthday (he usually get a small amount of money and mostly presents, so it won't be a huge amount) to charity.  I was surprised that he immediately said, "YES!" and is really into it. Then, we spent some time on the internet looking up different charities and causes Wm may want to support.   He has decided to give his birthday money to a charity that is working to end childhood hunger (ironic since Wm wastes more food than any human on the planet). I hope this makes him feel more grateful for what he has, realize that it is an obligation to give back when you have the means, and to know he really does lead a very charmed life - and not everyone does.  Wm  has a very kind little heart...and I want it to stay that way!

UPDATE...
Me: Do you want to go and volunteer with me at a place where we can actually help feed people who need food?
Wm: Ummmm...let's just give them money on the internet.

Birthday Planning

I made reservations for Wm's 7th birthday party...at Chuck E. Cheese.  Ugh.  So not looking forward to that hot mess.  But Wm is PUMPED.

I asked Wm if I could put some red lipstick on him and take his picture for s&g and Wm shook his head vigorously and goes, "I do NOT want that on the internet."  He's wising up.

Still Winter

Last week at work was INSANE. Some genius had scheduling start the first day back from spring break.  All my students were at Defcon 5.  And everyone else at work had some sort of bubonic plague so I was holding down the fort solo.  Hence the lack of exciting Wm updates.

Wm has been up to all his usual fun pursuits.  He has learned all about the Titanic and finds it fascinating.  He now rattles off random Titanic facts at dinner ("Did you know when the Titanic sank most ships turned their radios off at night? So no one heard the Titanic's distress call for a long time.  It's now the law that ships must leave their radios on all night because of what happened to the Titanic.")

Mimi took Wm summer clothes shopping this afternoon.  He got a ton of super cute stuff!!  Then, we came home to discover the Easter Bunny had visited Grandma and Grandpa! Wm was so PUMPED!!!!  He is currently putting together the Lego set.

Wm with his Easter spoils

Wm said he doesn't believe it the Easter Bunny and that he is a "myth."  He goes, "I think Grandma bought this stuff.  How did she know I wanted a Lego Chima set? She is so nice."

I have signed Steve up for acupuncture now for his weird hip biz.  I am hoping it helps!!  He is an old, sad man.  He goes next weekend for his first visit.  My jaw pain is gone (and hopefully this keeps it at bay!)  And Mimi has had equally good knee results. So hopefully Steve experiences similar success!

And this just cracks me up:

Annoying

The Fam was sitting on the couch and I reached over and flicked Wm for funsies.
Wm: Mommy is annoying me.
Steve: Get used to it.

St. Paddy's

Steve got it into his head that he wanted corned beef and cabbage today.  I have never had it, so I told him I'm game...if he made it.  So he did! And it was great!  Steve said it will be an annual tradition now.

Steve's materpiece

Wm randomly started doing The Robot.  Which is hilarious, because it looks more like he is having a seizure:

And, our new washer and dryer were delivered yesterday.  Despite Lowe's mixing up the hot/cold water inputs and not completely installing the dryer, they work great (thanks to Steve!)  So I spent the weekend doing piles of laundry.

Giant Shirt

Wm is a very disgruntled boy.  He has been signed up for swim lessons.  There is no escape.  He WILL learn how to swim!!  His first lesson is April 6 (indoors!) I was walking him to school today and he was all, "I don't want to go on vacation anymore."  When I asked why not he said it was because he didn't want to take swim lessons. I told him swim lessons were in the works no matter what and he better resign himself to learning to swim.  He huffed and puffed all the way to school.

He has also been signed up for baseball.  He is quasi-excited about this.  Because of how birthdays fall, he can't be on the same team as his BFF (if you were born after April 30, you're still in the 5-6 tee ball league instead of the 6-7 pitch league).  He starts that in late April. Wm goes, "TWO activities at the same time?!?!?!!?"  I think he's worried this will cut into his iPad time.

Poor Wm came home from school today with his Read-A-Thon tshirt.  All the kids are supposed to wear them tomorrow for a big assembly.  We ordered Wm a youth small, but it looked really big.  Wm tried it on and was all sad.  He goes, "I am too small for a small." I told him I thought the shirt was weirdly big for a youth small.  It was HUGE on him.

Way too big!

YOUTH small? Pffft.

Since Wm was all bummed about it, I said, "Wm, I seriously think this shirt would fit me."  He was still sad, so I put it on to make him laugh and it TOTALLY did fit me!  It actually fits me better than Wm.  Youth small, my fat butt.  But, Wm thought that was hilarious, took a picture of me in it, and said, "If my friends laugh at me tomorrow, I'll tell them it fit MY MOM!" So...win.  Wm is no longer feeling bad!

Picture by Wm!

Wm ruined our moment by then saying, "And you usually wear what...a grown up extra large?"

Standardized Testing

The world of testing has begun.  Wm had his first standardized test today at school.  I told him it would be fun - like playing word games.  When I picked him up, I asked how his test went and he said:

"It was dumb.  Not fun at all.  Super easy.  I looked at the question....immediately knew the answer, and then had to fill in a tiny bubble.  They did give us a snack."

Welcome to the world of standardized testing, Wm. The only thing that changes is that the snack disappears.

I had my first acupuncture visit today.  I loved the lady who did it!  She was super cool.  The needles didn't hurt at all, but some sort of deep stiffness has settled in a bit (this is supposed to be normal and is the precursor to the pain going away, I guess).  It was really relaxing!!  I am supposed to go in weekly for a month, then biweekly for a month, then just once a month indefinitely.  Most of the needles were in my right leg, weirdly.  But, I could totally feel it in my left jaw!!  Wacky wild stuff.

Caffeine

I went to get Wm from school today to find him running around the playground like a mad man. As we're walking home, I yawned and said, "Are you really tired today because of the time change?  I know I am!" And Wm yells, "NO!!!  I feel like I drank 10 cups of coffee!!!!!"  Then took off like a rocket toward home.  It's going to be a looooong night.

LBS.

I went to get a drink and came back to discover Wm had stolen my seat.

Me: You stole my seat!

Wm: You can sit on my lap.

Me: I will crush you.

Wm: No you won't.

Me: Fine.  Here comes the boom.

Wm: Ah. Ugh.  Oh...man...get up!  GET UP! You must weigh 100 pounds!!

Me: Indeed.

Child Labor

What Wm is usually up to...

While doing laundry today, the washer went crazy and spewed water everywhere.  Steve took a look and it appears as though the thing has finally rusted apart.  We got it used 5 years ago for next to nothing.  I'm surprised it lasted this long!  So we got to spend our day at Lowe's.  We did also spend a huge chunk of time cleaning the house.  Whenever sickness invades, the house gets really gross.  Wm even got in on the action:

Sweeping for $1

Child labor is awesome

Next, he had to fan Steve and feed him grapes

Wm said as we drove by Dairy Queen,"Ah, DQ...you used to be my favorite place - now you are my arch nemesis."

And, lastly, Steve has fallen victim and is now all sick.  Whenever Steve gets sick, things get real.  He mopes around like he has the ebola virus.  With the added stress of buying a new electronic item (which, of course involves HOURS of crazy online research), poor Steve is exhausted.  To pay him back for making me cookies while I was sick, I made him chocolate chip banana bread.  Seems fair.

Love Letter

Me: I went to the new, big Whole Foods they built on Lane.
Steve: How was it?
Me: Big and scary and weird.
Wm: Were there assassins?
Me: Um...no.
Wm: Pffft, not so scary then.
Wm apparently only thinks assassins, not yuppie stay-at-home-moms, are scary.  I, however, am terrified of SAHM's with yoga pants, brightly colored training tops, snotty children, and no concept of other people's space or feelings.  The horror...the horror...

Wm got a love letter today.  Our little neighbor put a note in the mailbox that said, "I love you."  It was adorable.  Wm, however, thinks this is the worst thing imaginable.  He is like, "SHE IS NOT MY GIRLFRIEND." And, he is reading this right now screaming, "DON'T PUT THAT ON THERE!" It probably doesn't help that I was all, "is she your girrrrrrlfriend?" and Wm was like, "NooOOOoooOOOooo!"

Proof

I am home sick today and Wm had a snow day, so we are both home yet again.  He was filling out an info card to get Lego magazines.  When he got to "State/Province" he yells: "How am I supposed to PROVE I live in Ohio!"  Haha!!!  I had to tell him "Province" referred to people who lived in Canada and is sort of like a state in a way - and is not asking for proof of state residence.

The Results

Steve got the results of his CT scan.  And...no hernia.  Best guess is now referred hip pain.  They think that his hip is so jacked up, other muscles are overworking themselves trying to compensate and then causing the pain.  I don't think Steve can put off his hip surgery much longer!!

Meanwhile, I got Wm's demon cold.  I was so focused on my face pain, I didn't do any of my other supplement stuff and succumbed to The Dread Plague Wm. So now I am miserable.  On the plus side, Steve felt so bad for me, he did cave in and make me cookies.  Almost worth it. Steve makes a mean cookie.

I was forced to go to our refinance closing despite my ailment.  Steve got us a 2.8%APR with his business acumen.  All I did was whine about having to track down old W-2's and attend the closing. Wm was really good and just hung out and played on the iPad while we signed everything.  Now we don't  have a mortgage payment until May 1!

Tech Boys

Here are The Boys, doing what they do....

Steve on iPhone, Wm on iPad.  As usual.

We got to see Papa and Donna today since we are finally all healthy!  It was my final birthday celebration.  And this trigeminal neuralgia thing is not paying the dividends I had hoped for.

Me: Hey, why don't you make some of those cookies again today?

Steve: The ones I made you for your birthday?

Me: Yeah! Those were super good!

Steve: No, your birthday is over.  Deal with it.

Me: I HAVE TRIGEMIAL NEURALGIA, STEVE!

Steve: Not happening.

Me: I have a very serious disease IN MY BRAIN.  And I need cookies.

Steve: Nope.

Me: I feel like if I had cookies, all my pain would be worth it.

Steve: You are not getting cookies.  

Me: It's like you want me to be in pain. 

Steve: [turns on radio]

** UPDATE: I forgot to share our crazy Whole Foods experience!  So they finally finished building the new WF on Lane Ave.  They were having a 50% off everything sale at the small swing space store today.  My plan was to arrive promptly when they open at 9AM and then go crazy.  When I woke up this morning it was really, really bright out.  No sign of Wm.  I peek at the clock and discover it is 9:30!!!!!!  Steve panicked and ran into Wm's room to find him still snoring away.  That kid has NEVER slept later than 9AM EVER. He rolled out of bed about 5 minutes later like it was no big deal.  By the time we got dressed and got everyone ready and went to WF...there was like one crumb left on the shelves.  We got nothing.  NOTHING.  I think Wm slept in for spite.

Extenuated

While eating dinner, Wm sneezed into his elbow, looked at it, then made a face.
Me: Gross, is there snot on you now?
Wm: No. Extenuated meat.
Me: Extenuated meat? What?
Wm: [looking unsure]
Me: Do you mean masticated meat?
Wm: Oh. Yeah. Masticated meat.