Hypocrite

Wm and I were discussing hunting when Wm suggested I hunt an animal to make me a fur coat for the winter.

Me: I would never do that.

Wm: Why?

Me: I would never wear a fur coat.  That is evil. [light bulb going off in my head] Hey...I just realized something.

Wm: What?

Me: I am a big, fat hypocrite. 

Wm: What is a hypocrite?

Me: Someone who says one thing, then does something else.  Like, I just said I'd never wear a fur coat because it hurts animals...yet I have no problem eating a hamburger.  And eating meat hurts animals just as much as wearing fur coats.  So...that is a hypocrite. Me. I am a hypocrite.  Because, I plan to continue to eat meat and refuse to wear fur.

Wm: Don't worry, Daddy is also a hypocrite.

Me: Why - what does he do?

Wm: He always SAYS he is going to remember to turn off the porch light in the morning...but then he never DOES.

Me: While that is annoying, it's not really being a hypocrite.

Wm: I think it is.  Daddy is a hypocrite.